Blood and Brains…
…Vampires vs. Zombies. Who would win in a fight between vampires and zombies and why? I’ve been asked this challenging question by Linda Le (www.vampybit.me) and Zombie Ammo (www.zombieammo.com). If you left it up to me, I am a bit biased as I am a HUGE vampire/werewolves fan. So by default I would say Vampires. But I will leave it up to how the current media and culture depicts this through my eyes.
Disclaimer: There will be no Twilight discussion here. If you are expecting Twilight stuff, go stake yourself in the chest and blow your bwains out.
Okay, lets start with my favorite. Vampires. The nominees of the most successful depictions of these creatures through my eyes are:
You have Selene, a beautiful and agile Vampire warrior mixed up in a war between Vampires and Werewolves. She belongs to an underworld of Vampires ran under a specific rule and hierarchy of elders. They also equip themselves with the latest technologies of weapons and have been adapting through the centuries to the modern world. There is no stopping Selene if she’s on your side fighting a battle…other than the sun.
Advantage: Modern weapons of Vampire technology. A powerful warrior “death dueler” name Selene leading the Vampire nation to hunt down werewolves. This technology can be applied to hunting zombies. Think of it as the Military Division for the Vampire nation and Selene leading this such army.
Another badass vampire, this time a hybrid. A day walker. This guy does not need to drink blood, but a serum that prevents him the need to drink blood. He can walk during the hours of daylight and hunt/kill anything in his path with just a gun and a sword. Trained to hunt down other vampires, his knowledge and skill can be applied to killing zombies. Even if the world ran out of humans to feed on, Blade does not need blood to live.
Advantage: Blade can serve as a leader. The General of the Vampire Nation. Basically no known weaknesses if brought to a situation of war with zombies. Blood? Nah, Blade doesn’t need blood. Ammo? Nah, just give him a sword and he’ll take care of the rest. The sun? Pshhh…King Kong has nothing on Blade.
THE LOST BOYS:
A group of insurgent vampires out with purpose. To kill, feed, and convert. David, the leader of this gang is super manipulative and clever. He can serve as the recruiter and commander of the Vampire army.
Advantage: As long as there is prey, David and his gang will get things going.
Now, onto the Zombies. The nominees of the most successful depiction of this group through my eyes are:
What? MJ? Yes! Have you heard of Thriller? If you saw a Zombie that looked like Michael Jackson on the street with an entourage of zombies dancing and singing behind him, wouldn’t you be captivated? Hell yes! So would the millions and millions of MJ fans out there who would be running and screaming to get close to Michael Jackson. EASY PREY!!! Instant brains and instant zombie army. All it takes is a zombie dance, a glove and the moonwalk.
Advantage: 100,000,000+ instant added to the zombie army with no effort at all.
(Zombieland, Night of the Living Dead, Day of the Dead, Return of the Living Dead, Dawn of the Dead, 28 Days later, Resident Evil, Shaun of the Dead, etc.)
What do all these have in common? Fast zombies, slow zombies, mutated zombies, crawling zombies, traditional zombies, modern zombies, biological zombies. One word. SH!TLOADS of zombies!!! Where did they come from? Who cares! If you are still a living human, you better find some guns, weapons and cover or become a vampire. You decide.
Advantage: 100,000,000,000+ more to be added to the zombie army.
So, in a world of humans, vampires, and zombies. Who will win? Definitely not the humans. Don’t even try to be human, there is no chance. It is a good tie with the vampires and zombies. Vampires have the intellect of weaponry, adaptation and skill. Zombies have the overwhelming numbers. You kill one zombie, you’ll have to worry about the other 100 that is after you, and the other 100 after that, and so on. Vampires will take over the night. Think of them as nocturnal killers. (unless you are a day walker like Blade). Zombies don’t stand a chance with intellectual creatures, especially in the dark. But once the sun comes back up, the zombies will multiply over and over replenishing their numbers.
It is up to you to choose who wins this battle.
If you choose zombie, easy. Don’t do anything. You’ll be easy prey.
If you choose Vampires, go to www.zombieammo.com to get your target sheets, ammo and gear. Practice your kills with the zombie target sheets. Get geared up for who’s side you’re on with your zombie ammo shirts. You’ll be ready for the zombie invasion. Also, be sure to help Vampy regain her powers by going to Vampybit.me. She is the chosen one that will bring balance to the force….err..I mean Vampires. 😉
Till next time, I’ll be cleaning my chainsaw for my next victim…….